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Thursday, January 10, 2013

Thrust into the Real World: Month 8

This month I began to seriously consider getting my first tattoo.
This is surprising for several reasons:

1.      I have a very low pain tolerance. When the dentist novocaines me and then asks if I “felt that pinch,” I always say yes, even if I didn’t, just to be on the safe side. I’ve made it perfectly clear that when I get my wisdom teeth out I want to be put into a medically-induced coma for at least three days, because I want nothing to do with that entire procedure.

2.      I’ve always said that in this day and age, it’s more unique to be tattoo-less than inked up, and we all know how much I like to go against the grain.

3.      This guy took my original idea, and how do you top that?
The quote I’m considering has always been a favorite of mine, and definitely conveys exactly what it is that I do every time I sit down to compose something for you lovely people. Whether it’s something a little more somber or absolutely preposterous, the words you’re reading are a window straight into this awkwardly-shaped head of mine. Regardless of if you find me entertaining or not (shut up, you totally do), you should feel very lucky because I’d sooner ramble on for three hours about the pros and cons of owning a Perfect Meatloaf Pan than share my emotions.
Let’s break down my idea:
Placement: It’s a toss-up between inner forearm or on my fingers. Some of you might think the wrist is very cliché, but A) screw you and B) I use my hands to write with, where else is it gonna go? Go admire the fairy on your foot and never talk to me again.
Quote: “There's nothing to writing. All you do is sit down at a typewriter and open a vein.” –Red Smith
I have dwarf arms and baby fingers so the probability of this whole thing fitting anywhere comfortably is slim to none. Therefore, I’d probably shorten it to just “open a vein.”
Color: Red.
Detail: This is where I’m most indecisive.
If I put it anywhere near my wrist, I want the words to be followed by a quill or fountain pen “cutting” the skin with a little blood dripping. I know this sounds morbid, but it also sounds fucking awesome, and we all know that I’m about as suicidal as a pig in a peach orchard so relax, this isn't a cry for help.
If I put it on my fingers, the fountain pen (outlined in black) would run the length of my middle finger and the words (in red) would be inside the handle.
One option is obviously a little more discreet than the other, but the cool factor beats camouflaging it for job interviews every time, so you can imagine which one I’m leaning towards.
If anyone wants to illustrate these ideas out and send them my way I’d be more than grateful; I still draw the same way I did when I was in 3rd grade so obviously my attempts haven’t completely convinced me yet.
Also, any feedback on whether this sounds legitimately cool or just Skylar cool would be wonderful. I once thought a short spikey pixie cut would look really good on me. Guess which “cool” that was?


  1. I would shorten it to "Sit down at a typewriter and open a vein". If you tattoo 'open a vein' on your forearm in red, it's going to look like a relic of a time when you were a serious cutter to everyone who doesn't know the whole story. However, it's a great quote, an awesome one to see everyday, and I actually think the wrist placement is very creative and appropriate. Go girl!

  2. Good point, although I included the pen in there for that very reason. Definitely don't want to give the wrong,"You laugh because I'm different, I laugh because you're all the same" vibe. Thanks so much for reading!


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